Cornelius and and the gay community

Acts 11:1-18

           Today in the church we remember Cornelius the Centurion, my namesake and the first gentile to be converted to Christianity.  Oh what a surprise it was that the message of Christ would fall not just on the Jews but on a Gentile. Whole essays could be written on how Jesus' message went far beyond his original (stated) intent. Jesus' actions may have told a more encompassing and embracing message but his stated presence was for the lost of Israel. How things change and how surprised were the Jews if not the Apostles themselves. It's a story worth reading. But me, never one to miss a message that can be used for the good of the gay community, have come up with some different ideas.

             What comes to mind first, the closest to my heart is my relationship with my husband.  This was a relationship that was not meant to be anything more than a friendship. This was my stated intent. My husband also made such a statement. I think it went something like this, 'we could be friends but you really need to find a therapist'. I suppose you could take it a couple ways but it was the best advice I ever received.  My husband may have had designs on me and I him but it was really not meant to be for all intents and purposes. Starting a friendship with a married man struggling with the mere idea that he might be gay is not the basis for a long term relationship. Even though the gay community has legions of relationships of gay men in deep loving relationships with (hetero) married men who claim they are not gay (they just like to ....you fill in the blanks),  they almost always end in heartbreak, unfulfilled. Who would have guessed that a recently divorced married man out on his own and a single gay man would fall in love and find such bliss and yes, even get married. Such is our story. I praise God every day and am thankful beyond measure.

                The second thing that comes to mind is simply looking at the gay community overall.  We may be typified by six pack abs, tight asses, Andrew Christian underwear and devastating good looks but we go far beyond that and honestly we are much deeper than that on so many levels. Still, we have engendered certain stereotypes. The fact is, we come in all shapes and sizes, all kinds of predilections and yes, we encompass women, men, asexual, bisexual and a whole array of letters that have made the original LGBT into an alphabet soup.  It seems God's imagination extends into territories we may been uncomfortable with at one time but we now are embracing the diversity and joy of His creation. The relationships are no longer defined by a paradigm of he and she, male and female. It would be insulting to even ask a gay couple "who's the man and who's the woman?" 

         Just as Cornelius broke new ground in bringing God's message to the gentiles, the gay community has broken ground showing the diversity, breadth and depth of God's created world in terms of sexuality. We are out and proud, we are here and queer, we are God's children and we may or may not be an image of Ozzie and Harriet, Ward and June or Lucy and Ricky. What really is cool today and serves as hope and recognition to the gay community are those 'gay' relationships in scripture ...and they are there. Google Jonathan and David, Ruth and Naomi or the Centurian (not the Cornelius of this passage) and his 'slave'. Read my blog entry "A dear slave" ( 9-17-12 ).

             The time for the gay community may have arrived, the recognition of the sexual diversity of God's created world may becoming recognized more and more but it is a surprise to some. Still, in all of this is a reflection of God's diverse and embracing love. In a nod to the creation stories which gloss over the real depth of God's created world I have to say "it is good".

           

Now the apostles and the believers who were in Judea heard that the Gentiles had also accepted the word of God. So when Peter went up to Jerusalem, the circumcised believers criticized him, saying, ‘Why did you go to uncircumcised men and eat with them?’ Then Peter began to explain it to them, step by step, saying, ‘I was in the city of Joppa praying, and in a trance I saw a vision. There was something like a large sheet coming down from heaven, being lowered by its four corners; and it came close to me. As I looked at it closely I saw four-footed animals, beasts of prey, reptiles, and birds of the air. I also heard a voice saying to me, “Get up, Peter; kill and eat.” But I replied, “By no means, Lord; for nothing profane or unclean has ever entered my mouth.” But a second time the voice answered from heaven, “What God has made clean, you must not call profane.” This happened three times; then everything was pulled up again to heaven. At that very moment three men, sent to me from Caesarea, arrived at the house where we were. The Spirit told me to go with them and not to make a distinction between them and us. These six brothers also accompanied me, and we entered the man’s house. He told us how he had seen the angel standing in his house and saying, “Send to Joppa and bring Simon, who is called Peter; he will give you a message by which you and your entire household will be saved.” And as I began to speak, the Holy Spirit fell upon them just as it had upon us at the beginning. And I remembered the word of the Lord, how he had said, “John baptized with water, but you will be baptized with the Holy Spirit.” If then God gave them the same gift that he gave us when we believed in the Lord Jesus Christ, who was I that I could hinder God?’ When they heard this, they were silenced. And they praised God, saying, ‘Then God has given even to the Gentiles the repentance that leads to life.’ 

In name only?

John 6:60-71

         There is this man named Newt Gingrich, a stalwart of the conservative agenda, pro-life, 'pro-family' and onto the litany of what it is to be a true conservative. One problem though is his personal record in the holy state of matrimony. Not only is it trouble as a conservative but to claim at the same time to be a good Catholic - well, it's laughable.

           When you want to claim something for yourself, in this passage, a follower of Christ, you are called to believe and act a certain way. Not perfect mind you, but give some convincing evidence you are trying. That's not for me to judge really, one way or the other, but it is certainly true. In this passage Jesus has lost some followers because they have the decency to say or know, they are not going to measure up. Part of this of course is the gift of faith but that is not my point.

            Basically you can't claim to be one thing and act as another. The media is full of high profile examples of televangelists gone amok with drugs and/or extramarital affairs.  Politicians who have acted and voted profoundly anti-gay but have been outed as being gay themselves. The same has been true of countless religious. Called to act in a celibate way and they are discovered to have affairs and secret lives. I have sympathy for them in a way because they are called to a standard even Jesus did not demand of his disciples. I could only say that if you agreed to live such a life you should have the decency to live up to it, not live some bifurcated life.  I know it was suggested to me. Married? Clergy? Gay? No need to tell anyone, just be quiet about it. Really? Really? 

              The part of this passage that strikes me the most is the decency these people had to walk away. A poor choice in my estimation but to discern that you will not be able to measure up and to walk away in respect and honesty is quite powerful to me.

              If we are called to a holy celibate life, if we are called to dedicated service, if we called to poverty and chastity then we really have to make a good faith effort to do as we say, walk the walk. The world seems full of people who want it both ways. If anything Jesus is saying if you want to follow me, then pick up your cross. Don't carve a life size balsa wood cross and throw it over your shoulder saying whoa is me.   We really need to have the decency to act in a way consistent with who we are as a person and who we claim to be as a person of faith. 

When many of his disciples heard it, they said, ‘This teaching is difficult; who can accept it?’ But Jesus, being aware that his disciples were complaining about it, said to them, ‘Does this offend you? Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? It is the spirit that gives life; the flesh is useless. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life. But among you there are some who do not believe.’ For Jesus knew from the first who were the ones that did not believe, and who was the one that would betray him. And he said, ‘For this reason I have told you that no one can come to me unless it is granted by the Father.’

Because of this many of his disciples turned back and no longer went about with him. So Jesus asked the twelve, ‘Do you also wish to go away?’ Simon Peter answered him, ‘Lord, to whom can we go? You have the words of eternal life. We have come to believe and know that you are the Holy One of God.’ Jesus answered them, ‘Did I not choose you, the twelve? Yet one of you is a devil.’ He was speaking of Judas son of Simon Iscariot, for he, though one of the twelve, was going to betray him.

Moving on

Luke 9:51-62

          When people know you are a spiritual person they often approach you with stories that might make them seem crazy. Invariably I am told of an old aunt that appeared as  ghost at the foot of their bed in the middle of the night. Or perhaps some interesting but almost unbelievable story of some ghostly appearance or happening. I try not to dismiss any of such things even if I have difficulty understanding it or even if I have doubt. I know that we all have different talents and levels of spirituality. I try not to dismiss off hand any of the psychics I hear about. I'm not sure I would put my life in their hands but I try to be open minded knowing there is more to life, this world and the next, that I know about. Perhaps our knowledge becomes clearer as we get older or approach death.

             Jesus knew what he was approaching and yet he approached anyway. Even if he did not know the specifics (and perhaps he did) he went to Jerusalem anyway. Not only that, he rebuked people that tried to stop him and rebuked those who would not respect the journey.

              I have known two people that were aware of their impending death and were able to speak about it. In both cases they were able to convey their willingness and readiness to move on. It is not a giving up but a readiness and a willingness to partake of the final steps of our earthly journey. They seem to know that the best is yet to come even if it mans saying goodbye to the ones they love here on earth. Jesus knew he was going to die and he ached. he was saying goodbye to his friends, his Apostles, his lover(?) and his mother. Not easy to say goodbye as  human person. Our lives are all about relationships. In the case of my latest 'aquaintance', my ex-mother-in-law, she is prepared to go and her strength now is geared to preparing the ones she loves to say goodbye and to accept what her journey is. She is ready to return to creator God and Father. If she was Jesus she would rebuke those who want her to stay beyond the time she know has come. In the former case, my own mother, I refused to acknowledge her readiness to go. In so doing I may have subjected her to years of an earthly existence that was not a full life as we think of it. She was bound to a chair in a nursing home for years before she returned to the Lord. I pray that she did not suffer and that I was able to love and learn from her in the time she had left. It is just tough to say good bye.

          There are people though who have visions and see the future or know it is their time and accept it. Who are we to hold back a life that God s calling?  Although it hurts immensely, we must have the ultimate respect for others' journey to wholeness and that transition back to the Father.

          I suppose this whole subject could evolve into an argument about one's right to die, or euthanasia. I would only argue for respect for one's life and one's ability to discern when they are ready to go. It respects a person's journey and it respects God who may be calling the individual back t his loving arms. Rather than being rebuked by God for interfering with his calling home of one of his children, I would rather respect that transition and help ease the transition in any way I can (short of making it happen). I don't believe in taking a life but I also don't believe we have a right to keep a life when God is calling someone home either. I'd rather not debate specifics.

         If anything I would point to this passage. Jesus headed to Jerusalem knowing what was coming. He would not rain fire down on the Samaritans because he valued their journey and them as brother and sisters. He rebuked those who did not respect his own journey.

         In everything we must honor each others journey to wholeness and to our eventual return to God. We may not understand it all, we may find it heartbreaking to say good bye but we must honor each others' journey.

When the days drew near for him to be taken up, he set his face to go to Jerusalem. And he sent messengers ahead of him. On their way they entered a village of the Samaritans to make ready for him; but they did not receive him, because his face was set towards Jerusalem. When his disciples James and John saw it, they said, ‘Lord, do you want us to command fire to come down from heaven and consume them?’ But he turned and rebuked them. Then they went on to another village.

As they were going along the road, someone said to him, ‘I will follow you wherever you go.’ And Jesus said to him, ‘Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests; but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay his head.’ To another he said, ‘Follow me.’ But he said, ‘Lord, first let me go and bury my father.’ But Jesus said to him, ‘Let the dead bury their own dead; but as for you, go and proclaim the kingdom of God.’ Another said, ‘I will follow you, Lord; but let me first say farewell to those at my home.’ Jesus said to him, ‘No one who puts a hand to the plough and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God.’

A change in direction, a return home

Mark 6:7-13

          There is a constant battle to return to the roots of what Christ taught. Sometimes we (all, people and churches) go far afield it would seem and we need some self reflection, a re-evaluation or re-alignment of our behaviour with that of which Christ spoke and lived.

           I see this going on today with the new Pope who eschews many traditions of the church to a return of the values of this passage. It almost seems a battle between the monks and priests who belong to orders (Franciscans, Dominicans and the like) and that of the diocesan priests. The former taking vows of poverty, the latter taking no such vows and often living in splendor and riches. No one need look any further than the bishop of the diocese in which I live. He swallowed whole chunks of living quarters that belonged to an order of nuns so that he could have his most elegant apartment complete with refrigerators to keep each type of wine at it's proper temperature. I am sure that is not sacramental wine we are speaking of. Then there was the Bishop in Germany who was taken to task for the cost of renovations at his residence which included at $20,000 bathtub and 1.1 million dollar gardens.  

           This week at the Friary I noticed a new book written by the Brother Clark Berge, The Vows Book: Anglican Teaching on the Vows of Obedience, Poverty and Chastity. This seems like a calling to return to the message and spirit of this passage take nothing for their journey except a staff; no bread, no bag, no money in their belts; but to wear sandals and not to put on two tunics. I am thinking this may be reminder and a path back to the original message that Christ gave us.  I can hardly wait to get a hold of a copy and read it.

        Lest you think this is philosophical banter on how 'order' priests should live versus the diocesan priest, think again. This return to simplicity and poverty is a call to all of us, not just religious and not just the ordained.  Live simply so others can simply live is something we can all try to do.  In a world where the media blasts every latest new and improved item with new technology, it is not an easy task. We are constantly being bated to live far from a simple life and indeed we are lead to believe we will be happier if we have the latest and the so called best.

        In the gay community the pre-occupation with fitness and the finest clothes seems to be another call in the wrong direction. Fine things are wonderful and nobody likes looking at a nice body more than me but to what extend do we live this kind of shallow life? When does appreciation become a pre-occupation? How can the gay community, or anyone, justify the monies spent on personal treasures when there are others that need assistance? The gay community is heavy with young people abandoned who need  a leg up or older gay men and women who are alone and have no one to help them and care for them. Is it right that any of us live in a lap of luxury or ogle the latest Gucci item when someone else goes hungry or is contemplating suicide because they think no one cares?

         A call to poverty is not discarding a way of life. A call to poverty is a re-assessment and a recognition that we need to try and move in the right direction. Track your movements today, what do you value? If you question what you see in any way, change directions and make a movement towards home.

He called the twelve and began to send them out two by two, and gave them authority over the unclean spirits. He ordered them to take nothing for their journey except a staff; no bread, no bag, no money in their belts; but to wear sandals and not to put on two tunics. He said to them, ‘Wherever you enter a house, stay there until you leave the place. If any place will not welcome you and they refuse to hear you, as you leave, shake off the dust that is on your feet as a testimony against them.’ So they went out and proclaimed that all should repent. They cast out many demons, and anointed with oil many who were sick and cured them.

Ordinary love, extraordinary lives.

John 15:9-14

            I have often said that life is not always fair. You could have two people who go out drinking, both try to drive home drunk and one will make it safely home while the other will wind up killing an innocent family on the road and spend the rest of their days in jail. Both committed the same crime of driving drunk. Perhaps one was luckier than the other. Life isn't always fair.

          The converse is also true. As Christians we try to live our lives the best we can, holding up Christ as our model, living and loving. Each day we wake up, we are given a new chance to love and say thank you. On most days we may wind up holding a door for someone, complimenting someone, listening to someone who is distraught or lonely and perhaps we may even volunteer our services or talents to those in need.  Our holy lives are as varied as God's creation. We are not limited to being a minister or a monk, a teacher or doctor or all of the above. There are so many talents and gifts and so many different lives. Today the church remembers the Dorchester Chaplains.  They answered their calls to to be ministers, Priest and Rabbi. They undoubtedly did all the good works and services they were called to do. On one given day tragedy struck and they were called to help their fellow man and all offered their lives for them. They set out the day doing their normal routine business of living and loving and ended their day by laying down those lives for their fellow man. Greater love hath no man indeed.

              Perhaps that isn't fair either, they started out doing the simple task of living their ministry and wound up dying. We all have simple tasks to do. Loving seems so easy.  Tell that to these chaplains, to Father Mychal Judge who gave his life on 9-11. Tell it to the missionaries who died of leprosy while they ministered to them.  But one thing is for sure, they all lived and loved ordinary lives but loves of extreme holiness.

          We may never be called directly to offer this supreme sacrifice but we are all called to love in whatever capacity we can, according to our gifts and talents. It does not matter one bit of you are straight, gay, black white, poor, rich, a woman or a man or somewhere in between. We are all called. 

         We are all offered the extraordinary new beginnings of each new day. It is an opportunity to live anew and love anew. Our offer to love can not be limited by the practicality of this world. When we love we are elevated to a life of holiness that transcends this world and in that loving act we experience a slice of heave here on earth.

As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you; abide in my love. If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. I have said these things to you so that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be complete.

‘This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you.

A consistant message

Micah 6:1-8

          The message has not changed.  Perhaps the Israelites were hard hearted and needed the rules and laws to guide them but the message was always there. This is the same message that Jesus proclaimed when he walked the earth.

           When I was a young parent I was a strict taskmaster. I had rules and I swatted bottoms when I thought it was needed. I even justified it by giving the kids a bit of rope. Seems fair enough, do this three times and you'll get swatted. I yelled and counted....1.......2........don't ever let me get to three! I was serious and rules oriented but not unloving. I know now the yelling and the swatting was not in order. By the grace of God I never went over the line I feared, that line that turns a parent into a cruel an inhuman monster. The monsters you hear about in the news where children in the guise of discipline are tortured to death. I never crossed that line and I abandoned the corporal for love. But I was strict and I had rules. That was one way in which I loved my kids, rules meant to protect them until they could decide for themselves. Rules so that could learn and eventually make educated, informed decisions on their own. But no mater what, they always knew I loved them. The ways in which I showed them love as a child differs from the ways in which I show my love now that they are adults and parents themselves.

               Throughout the Hebrew scriptures there were rules and laws the Jews had to obey. Always at the heart of these rules was love for God's people.  In this passage we catch a glimpse of a mature message to God's people.  This is the same message that Jesus proclaimed. God does not want sacrifices and rules. Jesus came to fulfill the law and his message was quite clear. The message is synthesized in the two great commandments. There is no third commandment about sacrifices and rubrics.  Humanity in God's eyes had matured enough. Like my own children, humanity had gotten to the point where they could make educated decisions on their own. The primary rule is the same as it always was, it is love.

             The question is how do we carry out that love. Is it a mature adult way or in a law oriented, rules and rubrics kind of way. The problem is, sometimes when you get so used to obeying rules you forget to think for yourself.  You can become beholden to obeying the rules at all cost and never fulfill the act that God wants more than anything - love. The message of love is in Hebrew scripture perhaps buried by the tons of laws they had to obey.

               With love truly in our hearts, let us all go out and love and serve the Lord.

Hear what the LORD says: Rise, plead your case before the mountains, and let the hills hear your voice.

Hear, you mountains, the controversy of the LORD, and you enduring foundations of the earth; for the LORD has a controversy with his people, and he will contend with Israel.

"O my people, what have I done to you? In what have I wearied you? Answer me!

For I brought you up from the land of Egypt, and redeemed you from the house of slavery; and I sent before you Moses, Aaron, and Miriam.

O my people, remember now what King Balak of Moab devised, what Balaam son of Beor answered him, and what happened from Shittim to Gilgal, that you may know the saving acts of the LORD."

"With what shall I come before the LORD, and bow myself before God on high? Shall I come before him with burnt offerings, with calves a year old?

Will the LORD be pleased with thousands of rams, with ten thousands of rivers of oil? Shall I give my firstborn for my transgression, the fruit of my body for the sin of my soul?"

He has told you, O mortal, what is good; and what does the LORD require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?

A level playing field

1 Corinthians 1:26-31

           You should know of my penchant to let everyone know how much they are loved. Just the other day I was noting how much we need to realize we are worthy. There have been a few movie plots where a person was given away at birth only to find out later on they are of noble birth.  The movie The Princess Diaries comes to mind.  That is a rather good example too because while Ann Hathaway finally steps up to the plate, she isn't snooty or pretentious, she maintains her air of normality. She remains human and decent and loving.

            Well, we are all worthy because we are all of royal blood.  We are all worthy. Not in the sense that anyone is better than any other. We are worthy because we are children of the king of the universe, God the creator. I am reminded of the words I pray at the beginning of our family meals, baruch atah adonai eloheinu melech ha'olam. That is, blessed are you Lord God, king of the universe. We are all equal heirs with the rights and responsibilities thereof. One of life's questions is how we live up to that fact.

              Sadly, the world we live in is filled with people and even social structures that do not consider everyone equal.  Our founding documents may say that, the United Nations may say that, but economies do not necessarily reflect that. Certainly the attitudes of some people do not reflect that. The hierarchy of many churches do not reflect that. And so we have this passage that tells us that God will turn everything upside down.  Jesus certainly acted as a radical for his time, hell, even for our time. 

           The people God is talking about are the people in the street that the fat cats won't invite to their parties. The people God is talking about are the ones that many people consider sinners, low lifes. You know, the tax collectors, women and lepers of Jesus' time. Today that might be an immigrant worker or a gay couple who have no more of wish than to settle down and honor a commitment to each other for the rest of their lives. No need to convert, proselytize the "gay lifestyle", let us live in peace and love together. Many straight married couples can't seem to do that without cheating, lying or sleeping around.  The people God calls will always be the unlikely ones in may peoples eyes.

          The key to remember is that we are all co-heirs to the kingdom of God. All brothers and sisters, all equally loved.  No matter what some people say, it's a level playing field. Step up to the plate and show them what you got. Honor your calling.

Consider your own call, brothers and sisters: not many of you were wise by human standards, not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth. But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, things that are not, to reduce to nothing things that are, so that no one might boast in the presence of God. He is the source of your life in Christ Jesus, who became for us wisdom from God, and righteousness and sanctification and redemption, in order that, as it is written, ‘Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.’